The Titanic

Letter From The Other Side; from Cynthia


Dear Del,

Have I told you Teddy is making a canoe?

I think it is an Inuit canoe design. Of course to be genuine it should be covered with seal skin or some type of animal skin but as Teddy is loath to skin anything roaming our hills and I would definitely do the same to him if he attempted it, he is using canvas which has been made waterproof by some sort of foul smelling substance.

I think most of the neighbourhood knows he is manufacturing something because there have been thick clouds of wood chips and dust and a cacophony of sawing and sanding sounds issuing from the garage for weeks. The size of the construction has now banished our cars to the driveway.

I have, up until a few days ago been referring to it as the Titanic, but now the ribs etc are being fixed in place and the shape is showing up I think it would be more suitable if I purchased him a fur hat, put some cow horns on it and allow him to invade England.

I know England has already been invaded but the inhabitants are a little friendlier now and seem to welcome back home grown eccentrics to their shores. Also, he really needs to go somewhere he recognizes because his map reading skills leave a lot to be desired.

I’m not at all surprised many of the English explorers who trekked across Australia trying to find various things, such as the other side and inland seas etc, became lost and died. If they were all as bad at finding their way in unfamiliar places as Teddy seems to be then it amazes me so many succeeded at all.
I have to admit that my family folk lore places one of the confused explorers on our family tree. But after reading biographies written about him, he seemed to have survived his treks and grew old enough to become very grand in his own opinion, a thorough snob and racist. Not a person to be proud of really.

Teddy’s idea of a short-cut has often led us into out-of-the-way quagmires and about two hours later for an appointment or a meeting than we would have been if we had stuck to the route on the map. Of course we have also seen some of the country that very few other people have seen and shocked the residents of villages with barely a handful of inhabitants wandering along their tiny streets by stopping to buy exorbitantly priced fuel from a one pump garage for people who are desperate to have enough in their fuel tanks in order to get somewhere else.

I’m quite convinced that had Teddy set out to find the other side of the country on his own when he first arrived in Australia he would probably be still making his circuitous way there forty years later.

As far as the canoe is concerned he has promised me he will take a river canoeing course to gain some knowledge from someone who knows what they are doing before he takes the dowel, rope and canvas construction into a lake or river.

Our former neighbour who seems to have the same odd wish to risk his life has said he wants to be on the vessel for the launching. I shall hope it is a warm day for the rescue team that will no doubt have to follow them into the water.
I suspect our neighbour’s wife will have much the same opinion and voice it to her spouse as I will when they arrive back drenched to the skin.

In the mean time the constructions go ahead interspersed by the slowly improving sounds issuing from the Indian flute.

I sometimes wonder just what genes he carries in his cells that he finds it difficult to become engrossed in something mundane or just a little boring.

He has just been in to complain that the material he is making the ribs from is not as good as he had hoped for because they keep breaking when he tries to bend them.
I reminded him men have since Adam had his rib used to make Eve, if we are to believe the stories, complained about the problems their ribs caused them and it is unlikely to change.

I am going for some sort of nuclear medicine scan test next week which will be handy if it makes me glow in the dark for Halloween. It will save having to think of anything to do to frighten any unexpected ghouls I may come across.

Do you plan any ghoulish things for yourself Del?

Love from your not so spooky ‘flower child’ friend,
Cynthia.